"Givers have to set limits because takers never do."

A very refreshing view and very uncommonly seen.

Yeah, being a parent is interesting these days. I would say to a kid that they don't have to share. It's up to them. Pretty simple. At the same time, I'd want them to respect the desires of the other kid who has the toy. If they don't want to share, don't strong-arm them. It's amazing we even have these conversations because it all seems so simple. I also teach my kids that they can defend themselves. I realize that's a little outside-the-box these days, though.

What a woman! She is the very heart and soul of an intelligent parent. For over 50 years, I have, when among strangers in social situations, I have only two rules that you need to guide your actions: 1. The right to say NO. 2. MYOB - Mind Your Own Business. Rand makes it very clear in her applications as how a society should work.

Refreshing, totally agree with the mom. I was an only child, and learned early when a "friend" broke one of my favorite toys at about 4, that you share only with those with your values. Otherwise you put stuff away until they left. My daughter was taught in school to share everything, and now in Ohio, they put school supplies in one giant box, and students pull from them regardless of how they care for them or what parent's bought. I find that highly offensive. If a child learns to care for what they have, they have the right to keep it and use it, not to share it with someone who has no sense of responsibility. Teachers are usurping that p0rentlal right, and taking it as far as property right bashing. Psychologists are part of the problem, and they usually have the most of of control kids at home. It is all part of learning to live for their own values, not those of some bleeding heard who thinks anything goes. If the child does not respect his own rights and the right to his property, then the other little five year olds will not respect him ultimately either. What about when the child has a car, will they loan it too, even thought parents are responsible legally?

As a Teacher I hear all the time, "Sharing is caring," and it always seems to be when they want something someone wants for their own. Love what this mother did.

The first lesson of property rights and resisting aggression. "Sharing" is tantamount to offering a bribe to be accepted and not attacked. Being selfish does not involve or entitle to predation against others. It does involve good manners as in asking, "May I?" when it comes to wanting to use others' property. This applies to adults as much as to children.

Children recapitulate the inborn animal drives for acquisition and wanting what others have, the predatory instinct for survival that instigates all wars and what civilized society has defined as crimes. Rationality is a late development and not widely shared. It is refreshing when someone like this mother, who is not a certified Randite, speaks out so plainly and reasonably.

This mother nailed it. It is not her son's responsibility to share. Those who want things should do what they need to to get their own - not demand that someone else provide them!

Growing up, most folks have run into "Users", individuals who seem to believe that "what's mine ism mine, and what's yours is negotiable." They want to be your friend as long as you have--or can be manipulated into a conspiracy--to get them something they want. A good example can be seen in a movie from several years ago titled "Sideways". For some reason some guys think its you're duty as a male (especially a frat bro) to conspire with them to "get them laid." I have absolutely no use for those ass holes.

I certainly agree with that mother, also with Dr. Ken-
nedy-Moore. When I was about 5, my next-door
neighbors on the blacktop (who were very good
friends of mine), when some of the younger ones
closer to my age, had recently started going to
Sunday school, started a thing of grabbing my
things, or wanting to, and calling me "selfish"
when I refused or resisted. (I don't know, but I
guess they had also picked up that word at Sun-
day school; it seemed to be a new weapon or
something). One night, Mama was putting me to
bed, and I asked her about it. She said some-
thing which I remember as being roughly" I guess sometimes, it's all right to be selfish when
you're only a little girl." She was no fan of Ayn]
Rand, as it turned out, and maybe she even for-
got that she had ever said that to me, but I think
it was a very good and lasting thing she did for
me that day. (That behavior on the part of my
neighbors turned out to be mainly a passing fad).

I agree with this article. When my kids were little, I sometimes encouraged them to share. I think my son was maybe 5 when he said something like "sharing means giving, but if you make me do it it's just taking." I realized he was completely right. I never told him to share again. I tried to respect their right to their stuff, even when I thought sharing was the better choice.

I try to give them this simplified philosophical narrative: Someone's parent went to work to make the toy. It was theirs. They agreed to take money for it; now it's ours. We agree to give you money or toys for doing your basic chores, and now it's yours.

Now I find myself falling into this lecture that they probably don't understand or care about. When they were kids I more frequently caught myself starting to order them to share. Many toys are much more fun when share; I had to resist the urge to order them to share and let them figure it out.