Galt's Gulch
10

Objectivist Parenting

Posted by Vinay 10 years, 1 month ago to Culture
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On Parenting, with Reason & Individualism (Objectivist style).
SOURCE URL: http://www.thesavvystreet.com/dont-act-like-you-own-your-children/

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  • Posted by Herb7734 10 years, 1 month ago
    Both my sons and I had a good relationship and as they grew up, I noted how they copied my actions, even to signing their names in the same manner I did. Upon realizing this I felt obligated to set a good example. Both became Objectivists by osmosis. Both became more successful in terms of $$ than me, and had insights that I have been able to learn from. What a great resource!
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    • Posted by Maritimus 10 years, 1 month ago
      Hi, Herb,
      Congratulations! I have a similar experience, also two sons. I set out, explicitly, even before I met my wife, to raise better people than I am. Never, ever lied to them, treated them as if they were older and more mature than their ages. If you knew all three of us, you would easily see that I succeeded. They are my closest friends and being a father became the most satisfying thing in my life. I know exactly what you are describing. We are both lucky, although most of the time I think that we earned it.
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      • Posted by Herb7734 10 years, 1 month ago
        Nothing lucky about it.
        Even though I read Rand from my teens forward I didn't consider myself an Objectivist until I met a psychologist friend of Branden and took the Basic Principles course. As to lying, I discovered that the truth was better, even though it could be painful. When oldest son at around age 8 needed allergy shots. The nurse & doctor told him that it's no worse than a mosquito bite. I took him aside and told him that he's going to get a painful needle, which will cause his arm to swell and then itch like hell. But I also told him that he was a tough guy and could handle it. Not even a whimper. He showed it off like a badge of honor. I'm happy for you and your sons. It is one of the great satisfactions in life. Especially since my son has recently become a grandpa himself. 4th generation? We'll see.
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    • Posted by CircuitGuy 10 years, 1 month ago
      I've had a similar experience to you and Maritimus. The truth can be hard, but there's comfort in knowing their parents aren't lying to them.

      I have not taught them to be all about wealth building, but my 6 y/o has a natural tendency to save, invest, and work. He likes opportunities to rake and shovel. My 4 y/o is young yet for that. My 6 y/o spontaneously mentioned going by Target that their managers are probably using his money to buy toys and if they pick toys kids like he'll make money. That's amazing. A lot of the time, though, they act like total morons. I can't believe they're going to be driving cars in a few years.
      When they were babies I questioned if the things we were doing would pay off. So far, at this early stage, they appear to.
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      • Posted by Herb7734 10 years, 1 month ago
        Their brains are yet unformed. Being moronic is actually quite advanced for them, as a moron refers to someone with a 12 year old intellect. But actually, children are childish. They are supposed to be. If they show a proclivity toward an adult aptitude, that is often a bonus, or a passing interest. You never know what it might lead to.
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  • Posted by Kerryo 10 years, 1 month ago
    I have to say that I missed the balance in this article. Yes, give them the freedom to make mistakes and experiment to find their passion. But I've also seen kids who were given no bounds and were left to struggle to figure out if their parents actually cared enough to say no in order to protect their safety (usually). I've never seen the authoritarian style work without some serious rebellion from the kids, though.

    I agree that as parents we really can't (or shouldn't) take credit for our children's success. And for any parent I think we all know that we don't get through our kid's adolescence without a lot of luck.
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  • Posted by teri-amborn 10 years, 1 month ago
    Steadfast parenting leads to steadfast children which leads to steadfast adults.
    When reality and reason are abandoned while parenting, adulthood is delayed and sometimes never achieved.
    The goal is to create well-adjusted adults who achieve happiness...whatever their productive goals are.
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